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Parenting Tips For These Times

Hello everyone. I am so glad to be back again. I have taken a very long break from my mom blog. Life has basically happened to us all. Need I say more. As you all are aware that the year 2020 has decided to take us on a roller coaster. Covid 19 took us all by surprise, rocked our lives in very monumental ways and the world as we knew it would never be the same. As we say in medicine, things might never really return to the original baseline. Honestly and personally, a lot has happened to me this year. I would share as time goes on. Someone comically described the events of this year as a horror movie. It is unbelievable that close to a hundred thousand lives have been lost to this pandemic. It is quite disturbing.

Schools, churches, businesses have been shut down, while a lot of things have been cancelled including proms, graduations, vacations, conferences etc. A lot of people have lost their jobs. It is a scary situation and these are uncertain times.

Now the question for us as parents is how do we help our children navigate these times without jeopardizing their mental, emotional and physical well being all together?

That is why I came up with these following tips to help your children thrive through these times.

Tell them the truth but allay their fears.

Whether you like it or not, they know that something is wrong. They know things are not right and many of them especially the older ones are scared and anxious. Many are confused as to why they cannot go to school or the daycare or see their friends. My daughter daily talks about missing Lollianna, her best friend. It is a sad situation but you have to be the voice of calmness in the face of the storm. You have to be strong and help them realize that this is a phase in our history and it will pass. Make it a teaching moment to help them realize that no condition is permanent, that the storm will pass, that the day would break and that the sun would shine again.

Educate them on the virus.

As least age-appropriately in a way they will understand. Tell them the facts, not necessarily going into the deep pathophysiology of the disease but especially emphasis ways to protect themselves with special focus on proper hand washing. Covering their sneezes and wearing a face mask whenever you have to go out. Since the stay home restrictions are being eased. You cannot give what you do not have, therefore you want to make sure you educate yourself too. Listen to the news but don’t imbibe the fear. Keep abreast of what is going on. I see a lot of adults at the mall with face masks on while leaving their kids’ faces uncovered with a mask. My guess is that such parents are still stuck with the belief that children are “immune” from the disease. That is not correct especially in the light of the new Multisystem inflammatory syndrome in children which is a condition caused by covid-19 in which various parts of the body parts including the heart, lungs, kidneys, brain, skin, eyes, or gastrointestinal organs are inflamed. Protect your children. Help them ensure they pay attention to all the preventive actions against the disease especially handwashing.

Maximize this time.

Believe it or not you will never have this time back in your lifetime. Your child is currently five years old, that child would only be five once in his or her life-time. That daughter of yours will only be ten once in her lifetime. So if you miss this special opportunity to pour yourself into your children in this pandemic despite your own personal struggles, you miss out of a big opportunity. So rather than complain about how frustrated and exhausted you are, be grateful first that you have healthy kids and have been saddled with the task of nurturing healthy children with rock-solid core values who would stand tall in the face of any ‘pandemic’ life throws their way. Do not fail the universe. Do not miss out on these time. When you get off your zoom call, play games with your wards, bond with them. Teach them to cook. Paint with them. Get messy with them. Laugh with them. Be physically and emotionally present. Basically, pour your time, energy and entire self into these precious ones.

Pray with your children.

Praying with your children provides succor and reassurance that despite what might be going on, there is someone up there, a divine force looking out for them. We pray every night with our children. We get to hear the cutest prayers from a three year old and a five year old. I smile when they say things like “Dear God, take the corona virus away and help those who are sick feel better.” Pray with your children, pray for your children. Max Lucado said and I quote ” Our prayers may feel awkward. Our attempts may be feeble. But since the power of prayer is in the one who hears it and not in the one who says it, our prayers do make a difference.”

I hope you find all these tips helpful. Till when next I come your way, wash your hands, wear a face mask, practice social distancing and stay safe.

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Tips for Traveling with children on vacation.

We had a family vacation earlier in the year and it was lovely. Since a lot of people would be traveling around this time or in the coming months, I just want to share some important tips I believe moms should pay attention to.

A friend mentioned to me that going on vacation with kids is just basically still taking care of children only in a different location. Just like a change of venue for your routine responsibilities. Perhaps in a much nicer place and with lots of sunshine. I quite agree with the person, but something is better than nothing! You just have to make the best of every situation. Listed below are things to bear in mind as mothers when you go on vacation with your child or children.

Make sure everyone takes a bathroom break before setting out. If you have a baby, make sure nappy is changed. You do not want to set out with irritable babies. Irritable babies/ kiddos and vacation simply do not go together.

Let the shower run first to reduce risk of Legionella pneumonia. Whenever you get to your hotel room, always allow to water from the tap or shower head run for few minutes before you attempt to use the water or get a shower. Legionella bacteria is type of bug that is dispersed in airborne water droplets, so the spray created by a shower is the perfect delivery mechanism. Anyone using a contaminated shower risks breathing in the bacteria and developing Legionnaires’ disease as the bug takes hold in the lungs. That can cause pneumonia which is a type of infection of the lungs. Nobody wants that, so you might want to pay attention to this fact. This is because the bacteria can easily grow in pockets of stagnant water through any water outlet, especially in shower heads. I am a doctor by profession, therefore you can guess that there will always be an infusion of useful medical tips.

Always pack Tylenol if travelling with kids. In addition to a miniature first aid kit for scrapes and bruises, you want to include Tylenol on your packing list for a vacation. You are not trying to be a harbinger of ‘doom’, but preparation is crucial in life. Especially with kids. Of course , if the child is running fever unabatedly for more than 24-48 hours with worsening symptoms, go to the nearest hospital to you.

Always make the children especially the pre-schoolers and toddlers ‘pee’ before leaving your hotel room. This is to reduce number of bathroom breaks. You want to reduce the frequency of contact your kids have with public toilets no matter how impeccably clean they are. Another quick tip is to always go for toilets that are at the extreme ends away from the entrance because most people typically opt for the closest one. You want to choose the least used option for your children! That is the smartest thing to do. Of course, you do not need a prophet to tell you to always use toilet seat covers. If for some reason there are no seat covers, what I do is double a layer of toilet roll on each side of the toilet seat and allow the child seat. If I feel so strong, I carry the child up with absolutely no contact with the toilet bowl. It is a win-win situation for both the germophobe of a mom and happy child who finds mom’s gymnastic moves quite fascinating.

Always have a pack of sanitary wipes and sanitizer in your bag. Did I just mention to you I have a tinge of germophobic tendencies? My knowledge of micro-biology in med school does not help very much either. Then, you will be more understanding of my stance. There are germs everywhere and so you want to keep your children safe. Especially, when you are on vacation and really cannot wash your hands and your children’s hands all the time, you have to make do with sanitizers and sanitary wipes. It is not every fast food joint that readily provides hand sanitizers. Plus when hunger is added to the mix, a piece of french fries could reach the mouth faster than you would find your way to the nearest wash hand basin. Everyone must wash hands after each adventure. Now you know why.

Don’t make the mistake of eating out all the time. Pack some home-cooked food. Maybe enough for one meal. At least your family gets some good, home-made meal before the vacation diet kicks off. Most hotels have a micro-wave oven. Pack cereal. Eat left overs. This is economically wise. Plus you will be so amazed at how much left overs can easily accumulate. I personally do not like wastage, so I make my family eat left overs. We paid hard-earned dollars for them anyway.


Pack the children’s multivitamins and meal supplements. With all your packing, it is important to pack the children’s multiviamins. You don’t say because you are on holiday, then your kids miss out on important multivitamins to make for healthy growth of their bodies and brain. For me, I have a child who is a picky eater, so I always pack some Pediasure with me. Whoever invented that thing is a genius.

Pack activity kits for the kids. This should include their favorite books, bible and devotional, coloring pencils and plain papers or activity books. This could literally save your life. It would give you some breathing space while the kids are still well engaged.

Take sunscreen. This is especially important in the summer months. You want to protect your children from the ultra-violet rays of sunlight.


Pack extra grocery bags for make shift laundry bag . The purpose of this is for used items like soiled clothes, dirty socks and underwear. Some people pack disposable things to be used. Whatever works for you and your budget is fine. You can still be organized in a way while vacationing and having a good time with your family.

Don’t use all the drawers in your hotel room. This is to reduce chances of forgetting anything. You can use the top layers, but that’s it! Actually, I avoid using drawers all together. Whenever, you are ready to go home after your vacation, always ,double-check all drawers, check every single room, including bathroom. Try to check the floor or under the bed for anything of value especially a credit cards or your phone charger.

I hope you found these tips really useful and would bear them in mind on your next family vacation.

“The greatest legacy we can leave our children is happy memories.“
— Og Mandino

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How to Nurture Kids with Zero Sense of Entitlement

My husband and I try to be very intentional with our parenting. Since everyone keeps telling us that there is no particular manual for parenting. I honestly wish there was something like that. That perfect ‘one-size-fit-all’ parenting style that ultimately yields the “perfect kids” by human standards. Therefore, I try to do my research. I try to seek answers to questions I have about parenting. Believe me, I have loads of them. One of the questions I asked was how to raise children with no sense of entitlement. The question was born out of an observation I made about the attitude of some youths we currently have in circulation. Being entitled is the belief that one is inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. It is okay to be self-assured and be stoically confident, but the moment an individual goes about thinking that the world owes him or her something, then there is a huge problem. So I decided to find out practical things to do to set our children in the right direction with zero sense of entitlement. Itemized below are some of the answers I discovered and came up with;

1 Serve others with your children. Let them see you help others. Let them see the needs of others, so that they learn to be grateful for their portion. They learn to appreciate that there is nothing they have that they have not received.

2 Allow them to stumble. Do not attempt to cushion the fall. Help your child understand that we live in a world governed by principles and that there is something called cause and effect. That there is a consequence for all actions and inactions as well. Stop the ‘helicopter parenting’ business. Don’t try to shelter your child from every disappointment life brings because then they don’t learn to face the reality of life. Let your children understand that sometimes in life, we fail at things but it is okay. As long as we identify why it happened and we do better next time. Not blaming someone else for something that went wrong. Don’t hide your failures. It does not depreciate your value before their eyes. The truth be told, every parent was not always first position in every class!

3 Understand your main goal as a parent. This should not be to make you children happy but to nurture kind children who have learnt the value of contentment with a heart of gratitude.

4 Connect them with your roots. Tell them your story..How you defied all odds and overcame adversity to get to where you are today. Take them to see landmarks of your little beginnings.

5 Teach them to say thank you always. Let them imbibe a culture of gratitude. Being grateful for everything. I tend to hold on to stuffs I hand out to my children, until they say thank you, I don’t usually let go of whatever item it is till I hear the magical phrase. For instance, if I hand over a popsicle to a child, I stretch my hand to the child, and as the child reaches out to pick up the popsicle, I do not let go until the child says ‘thank you’. Gradually my little ones have imbibed that culture of saying thanks. So they know if mommy is holding on to something they want and mommy has, they need to say a phrase which is ‘thank you’.

6 Do not negotiate with your kids. I know sometimes in parenting, negotiating with your kids is the easiest way out, but on a long term basis, you are damaging that child. The child learns to associate doing the right thing with getting something in return. A child does not want to put on his or her leather boots on a cold chilly winter morning because the child wanted a pair of colorful sandals. You offer the child some treat because you are running late for work and could not afford a show-down so you ‘bribe’ your child. Don’t do that. Don’t negotiate with a ‘terrorist’! That’s a joke.

7 Follow through. Enforce whatever you say you would do even if it breaks your heart. Trying to discipline kids is a tough terrain. You are practically ‘saving’ the child’s life. The child doesn’t like it, you don’t like, but you are the parent and you have a responsibility to do the needful. Stick with it and let the child thank you in the future. However if you don’t see through whatever you said you would do, you lose your respect. That won’t be a good thing.
If you say you are taking the iPad away for the week, don’t change your mind and bring it out after two days. It sends conflicting messages to kids that further reinforces a deep sense of entitlement.

8 Give your child chores.
Age appropriate chores teach responsibility, work ethic, and life-skills. So many adults enter the world out of college and don’t know how to cook, do laundry, clean a toilet, or even rinse a dish because they were never expected to do any work around the house. Let them do chores. We are in a world with children with intelligence at a coding level, doing awesome things with technology at a very tender age, yet they are let off the hook with simple chores around the house. Let them learn responsibility early. My little ones know one of their chores is to lay their beds when they wake up. Even though I end up doing 95 % of the actual bed laying, its a good thing for them to be involved.

7 Teach your child to give, to share and to save. The best way to do this is to model this. Teach the child to pay a tithe to God, to save for the future and to share with others. It is never too early to start.
You cannot enforce what you don’t do, that would be tantamount to hypocrisy.
I bought for each of my child a piggy bank and we regularly invest. That’s good start.
Saving teaches money management skills at an early age. This ultimately gives the child a shot at financial responsibility and a reduced tendency towards a sense of entitlement.

8 Help your child learn patience. Make them wait. Waiting could be painful sometimes, but it helps kids acquire the virtue of patience.
A lot of adults in our generation have a hard time delaying gratification, therefore we want their generation to do better.

9 Help them appreciate that there is time for everything. That is my latest parenting mantra. I let my kids know when we go to the mall for example that we came to the store to buy XYZ and not ABC because that was not the time for it. There is time for everything in life. That in life there are seasons and that is standard.


10 Pray for your child. Parents can cross all the “t” and dot all the “i”s, nothing is guaranteed. However, with prayer you commit the child into the hands of an ever faithful God , then something is guaranteed.

“Parenting is not giving your child everything they want. Parenting is not being your child’s friend. Parenting is about preparing your child to be a useful and respectful person in society”. – GloZell

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Preparing your Child to Read

My son woke up about 5 am that morning and found me working on my computer. Actually working on a personal project. Then he asked me to read him a book. Really, at 5 am in the morning. I have a strong feeling he is going to be an early reader. He has really keen interest and genuine love for books.

So I abandoned my personal pursuits and read ” I am Tippitty Too” Ilustrated by Akemi Gutierrez. He kept laughing and giggling as I initially started reading the book reluctantly , but I had to join his infectious laughing bouts because of the funny rhymes of the book. “I am Tippity Too. Who are you? I am bear. Tippity tippity tear….”

So I end up having one of those golden mom moments with my four year old son. Coincedentally it was the morning of mother’s day , 2019. The best gift. The sound of joyful laughter and the enduring maternal bond.

I have listed below a number of things you can do to adequately prepare your child to read without stress or tears

1.Choose books with words that rhyme. Dr Seus books are great. This would be a great source of lyrical fun for the child. Books with short rhyming sentences are great.

2. Choose colorful books. The words are not enough to attract and sustain the attention of a pre-reader. Pick books with beautiful pictures and attractive illustrations.

3. While reading take pauses to talk about the pictures you are seeing. From time to time you can add some of your own embellishments to make the story more descriptive. I find myself adding extra phrases while reading to make it more fun.

4. Pick books that fit your child’s interest. For my son it is any book with Trains and Dinosaurs, while for my daughter who is a proper ‘girly-girl’, it is anything with barbie, princesses and Fancy Nancy. However let them explore new interests by allowing them make supervised choices on trips to the library or a bookstore. Plus it’s also fun for them to make their own choices of books to read. If the book captures the child’s attention as much as it did to the child in the picture below, such that the child finds it hard to let the book go, then that is a good thing!

5. Pick books that are easy for your child to handle. Pop-up books are also great.

6. Also check out the “Picks of the week”. Don’t hesitate to ask the librarian for recommendations. They are experts! Actually, most Saturdays we make trips to the library and my children love it and actually look forward to it.

7. Always make treat available after a trip to a book store or the library. When they come to know that there would be treat after the library, it makes the library look more like ‘heaven’ to them, only one full of books.

“Once you learn to read, you will be forever free.” — Frederick Douglass
“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more you learn, the more places you’ll go.”— Dr. Seuss, “I Can Read With My Eyes Shut!”


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Swimming Pool Safety Tips For Summer.

Photo by Edneil Jocusol

Summer is officially here at long last! It is the brightest and supposedly happiest season of the year. However, as we get ready for all those trips to the beach, the water parks, pool parties or fire up the grill for some delicious Barbeque, we need not throw caution to the wind.

I remember one fateful summer when a family friend had invited us to a birthday party of their daughter who had turned five. It was a pool party. I had a very scary experience. The party was going on smoothly and all till it wasn’t. The lively Nigerian music blasted through the speakers. People were swaying their hips to the rhythm of the music. Of course, there was Jollof rice (no Nigerian party is complete without this dish), grilled chicken, beef, fried plantain, salad, pounded yam and vegetables, and lots of drinks. It was a very merry atmosphere. A lot of goodies for the kids. As you would expect of a pool party, people were dressed in their swimming suits (including myself), especially the kids and their accompanying adults. However, there was no life guard and no adult was specifically designated to that role. There was a sign that stated ” Swim in the pool at your own risk”. That was a bit scary, but I deliberately became oblivious of what the sign said. I just said to myself “That sounds scary but we would be careful.”

Other kids were having fun swimming in the pool including the birthday celebrant and her friends. I got my serving of food, as well as that of my two toddlers. I managed to shove some food down my son’s throat( a picky eater by default), whose only focus was on the pool and nothing else. The boy has some sort of affinity for water. A tendency he had since he was very little. Little wonder why I registered him in a swimming class when he was two. His younger sister is the exact opposite. Perhaps as if the water would mess with her ‘divahood ‘ in some way. She obviously had no plans of going near the pool. So there I was, with a toddler who had no plans of getting anywhere near the pool of water and at the same time another who could not wait to get in! I was by myself at the party. I had no nanny at the time and their dad was not around. So I sat my daughter down on a chaise lounge and got into the pool with my son who was having the time of his life. Eventually when daughter saw how much fun her brother was having, she was able to set aside her aversion for water temporarily and asked to join in. She did, but I was not having fun. Having to watch two toddlers play in the pool like a hawk was not exciting for me because I just could not push aside all the horror stories I had heard about little kids and swimming pools. Then someone needed to go potty. I had to get them both out of the pool, wrapped a towel around each child and find the rest room. Chai, it’s not easy to be a mother-of-two !

I was changing my daughter’s nappy while I asked my son to wait. Nappy change was done in less than a minute and so was my son totally done with waiting. By the time I turned around , he was gone! In a jiffy, with my daughter in my left arm and wet diaper in my right hand I rushed out of the rest room and found my son in the pool already drifted to the deep end of the pool and struggling in the water, but unfortunately nobody even noticed. Fortunately for me, he had his life jacket on. That probably saved him. With immediate effect I dropped my daughter by the edge of the pool and ran into the pool with the wet diaper still in my hand as I rushed towards my son to grab him. He must have taken a few gulps of water. That was a scary life experience for me. What shocked me the most was the fact that, despite so many people being around the pool, no one saw a struggling little boy. I would never forget that day. So, when you think I am paranoid about swimming pools and little children, now you understand why.

Two valuable lessons I learnt that day.

First, If anybody would be going near any body of water, either the swimming pool or a beach, they must know how to swim. I learnt to swim during my housemanship year immediately after medical school. You have to enrol your little ones very early to learn to swim. There are some life-saving skills that are not negotiable. Swimming is one of them.

Second, Never leave your child unattended at any point in time near a pool. At all times there must be an adult who is fully oriented in time, place and person, watching your child. Imagine what could have happened if I had been distracted after leaving the rest room or did not rush out to grab him immediately. God forbid.

Your guess is as good as mine, that marked the end of the party for us, It was time to go HOME! Thank you very much. Unfortunately, we could not wait for the birthday cake.

However, an unforgettable and valuable life lesson was learnt.

In summary, here are quick tips as you spend time with your little ones around the pool this summer:

  1. Always, always ,always put a life jacket on your child. It is a life saver! You just read my story.
  2. If anyone needs to go near water, they need to learn at least the basics of swimming. Time to enroll those little ones in swimming classes. It is not too early! Neither is it too late.
  3. Ensure that there is an adult assigned specifically to watch your child. Never assume that someone else is doing so.
  4. Never leave your child unattended to near a pool. You must be able to account for that child at every minute. Anything can happen in one minute with little ones. While the goal is to have fun, at the same time there is need to be vigilant.
  5. On no account should a child run near a pool. Usually the floor is wet and slippery and any kind of fall would not be good.
  6. Ensure that the child does not wonder off to the deep end of the pool unsupervised.
  7. Do not forget to apply your sunscreen.

I wish you all a safe, fun-filled and memorable summer.

“Summer is the annual permission slip to be lazy. To do nothing and have it count for something. To lie in the grass and count the stars. To sit on a branch and study the clouds”. – Regina Brett

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The Advantages of Gardening with Kids

A few weeks back we took a trip to a farm where we got a flowering plant and a strawberry plant as well. I told my children they were allowed to pick a plant each. So my four year old son chose a bright yellow flowering plant called Calendula, while his two year old sister picked a strawberry plant. Good choices right?

You can read about that trip here.

I saddled both of them with the responsibility of watering their plants each day. Plus they get really excited about doing it anyway. Those times served as teaching moments on the beauty of nature and the things required for a plant to grow. They tend to appreciate it because they could see the process right before their eyes.

Below are a few benefits of gardening with your children :

It encourages healthy eating.

When kids see the way the plants grow, especially if they are a part of the process, they are more inclined and more than excited to munch on whatever they grow. You need to see the excitement and joy on my daughter’s face as she tasted the strawberry she harvested herself. The one she watered everyday. Peradventure you have a picky eating child, you might want to inculcate this into your life and encourage the child to be a part of the process of nurturing plants and vegetables, then perhaps the child would be more open to eat from the produce of your garden.

My daughter’s first harvested strawberry from her plant.

It gives them a sense of importance.

That they have been given a responsibility to take care of their plants definitely makes a child feel important. So they know that if they do not give the plants water to “drink” the plants would not grow. Observing how the plants are thriving because they are taking care of them would give them a deep sense that they are doing something very important and so their role is very valuable. Money cannot by the pure joy written all over the face of my daughter as she harvested her first strawberry from her cute strawberry patch in the tiny pot.

They get to learn some science from a young age in the most fun way.

You get the chance to explain the parts of a plant – the stem, the leaves, the fruits, and the roots. You get to tell them the requirements for a plant to grow healthy. That way they will find their science or biology class in the future more fun. The teacher would have less struggles explaining the concept of photosynthesis and all that good stuff.

It teaches responsibility.

It teaches kids at an early age to be accountable and responsible for something. They know that it is their duty to give the plants a “drink” of water or that they will dry up if they don’t. They do not want their plant to dry up so they take their responsibility seriously. They also have a faint idea of what consequences could mean too.

It helps kids appreciate nature.

From the brilliant and beautiful colors of the flowers, with their glowing radiance, to the lush greenness of the leaves, children learn to observe nature at close quarters, respect it and develop a keen sense of appreciation for it. They tend to be more observant of the beauty of the world around them. Many times my son would offer to draw me pictures of flowers. These are the various flowers he has seen and observed at some point.

It teaches patience.

This is an important life lesson you want your child to learn early in life especially in a jet age of instant gratification. Gardening is a slow process. They appreciate that it is not the day you plant a seed or get a small plant that you will start harvesting fruits or vegetables from it. They understand that it takes a while for the flowers to bloom. They daily observe the tiny bulb as it shoots out, they see it gradually get bigger, and then appreciate it when in full bloom. It teaches children patience by being a part of the process.

She got to pick yet another ripe strawberry another day.

“The glory of gardening: hands in the dirt, head in the sun, heart with nature. To nurture a garden is to feed not just on the body, but the soul”. -Alfred Austin

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How To Help Your Child Have a Great Handwriting.

I have a confession….. My handwriting is almost gorgeous, which is why I am committed to this goal to ensure my kids get it right. I am not sure about what went wrong when I started learning to write. I am sure I never skipped school. Perhaps my handwriting teacher took leave of absence when it was my turn to learn. Lol.

I did console myself with the notion that generally doctors have terrible handwriting. However, I know a handful of my classmates from medical school who have impeccably amazing handwriting. Which makes this general notion wrong.

Many times people had taken “jabs” at me for my handwriting in the past, but over time I grew a thick skin. I am not concerned as long as it is clean, clear and legible. I will start getting really worried the day I cannot read my own handwriting.

Back in medical school, one of my colleagues once said my writing looked like EKG. Highly hilarious right? I did not find it funny at the time. Over time, life has equipped me with a keen sense of humor. So I can basically joke about it now and go into hysterical bouts of laughter just thinking about it.

It also makes me feel good to know that my handwriting shares the same playfulness trait to it as that of Albert Einstein, the most famous scientist who ever lived.

Someone had this to say about Albert Einstein’s handwriting; “This is a guy who has deep powers of concentration and is usually quite skeptical,” said handwriting expert Dale Roberts.” Things need to be proven to him and he is not satisfied with superficial answers. He has a ‘probing’ mind and thinks complicated thoughts that would be beyond most of the population.” How can anyone read so much meaning into a person’s personality by merely looking at their handwriting? Quite fascinating I must say.

Graphologists (these are people who study handwriting) believe there is very little you can’t tell from a person’s handwriting. From physiological conditions like high blood pressure and schizophrenia to personality traits like dominance and aggression.

I discovered that according to graphologists, someone who is physically very weak shall leave the loops of “g” and “f” incomplete. While someone who is physically strong shall draw complete and closed loops of “g” and “f”. Maybe they are right on that one. I complete and close the loops of my “g” and “f” and many describe me by the word “strong”. I still wonder why.

Someone who writes small “i” with its dot little ahead of the actual letter is a fast thinker. If the dot is behind the letter then he is a slow thinker. Well I am quite skeptical about this one. I keep the dot of my “i” right on top where I believe it belongs. Perhaps I am just a “normal” thinker. Also, the belief is that organized and emphatic people place the dot firmly above the “i” when writing by hand. I totally concur with this.

The good news is that it is possible to bring changes to your handwriting by working on it daily to achieve desired results. Which is why I have to lay the correct foundation for my wards.

So if there is a direct correlation between the handwriting and a person’s personality, then as parents we want our children to have well-rounded, robust, and flourishing personalities. There is a need to dedicate a significant portion of your parenting life to ensuring your kids have perfect handwriting. This makes this post quite relevant.

The goal is not necessarily to achieve calligraphic excellence or sophisticated cursive. The goal should be to use your child’s sweet scribbles to develop their pre-writing skills. Writing is a form of multi-tasking. This is because your brain tells your hands to write and your hand obeys by moving from one part of the paper to the next, constructing letters and numbers and shapes; while your eyes focuses on all that movement and the words.

Handwriting helps your child understand and get comfortable with multi-tasking in the most effortless manner -simply putting a pencil to a paper.

Through handwriting, they are able to express themselves and communicate with the world around them and we owe them the ability to do this with ease.

Handwriting is one of the most important fine motor skills every child must develop. Handwriting is an art which can be learnt, developed, mastered and perfected.

Either your goal is Cursive( e.g looped cursive, Italic cursive, connected cursive), Print handwriting style, or D’Nealian type of penmanship, make it clear and go for it.

I might not have an idea on what my style of handwriting is, the only word I desire describes my children’s handwriting is Flawless.

Practical Ways to Help your child have a great handwriting

1.Help them develop the muscles of the hand. This can be achieved by activities such as scissors cutting, playing with play dough, squeezing wash up sponges or bath sponge, by using water spray bottles or paper crumpling.

2. Teach them how to properly hold the pencil. Their pencil grasp must be good. Dynamic Tripod Pencil Grip is great. It involves the tips of the thumb, index and middle fingers controlling the pencil in the dynamic tripod pencil grip. The thumb is opposed to the fingers, while the ring and little fingers are curled into the hand to give stability. Model the correct grasp till they get it. Children learn best when they see their parents model the best way for doing something.

3. Let them do a special ‘grip manouvre’. You can help improve a child’s grasp by having them do what I call the special grip manouvre which involves holding a pom-pom or cotton ball in a fist involving the third, fourth and fifth fingers leaving the thumb and index finger free. Alternatively if you have an old sock, cut two holes in it, put the hand in while the thumb and index fingers are allowed to find their way out via the holes. Then make the child hold a writing utensil. This helps as the child learns to hold a pencil the right way.

4. Offer the right writing tools. Kids do not need parchment or a quill and ink. They need crayons or well-sharpened pencils( as long as they are monitored not to either injure themselves or eat the lead in the pencil).

5. Another tip is to break those crayons(or pencils) in half. I know this sounds really weird. The rationale for this is that if you give your child big writing materials, they will squeeze all their tiny little fingers on it thereby exerting so much energy in holding the pencil or crayon versus actually writing properly. Don’t allow their fingers suffer fatigue before they have even started. This reduces their chances of developing bad writing habits.

6. Ensure that the enviroment is condusive and all distractions are eliminated. The TV is off. The ipads are carefully stowed away safely. Then let the writing fun begin!

7. Music could enhance the handwriting process. Music could be helpful as long as it is not one with lyrics that hinders concentration and productivity. A low level ambient music( e.g sound of water) improves the child’s mood to write and boost creativity.

8. Practise, practise, practise. Let them practise writing letters, all the letters of the alphabet. Let them fill in the gaps. Every opportunity to practise writing or enhance the process, just take it.

In researching this post, I gained knowledge which I do implement. I hope you find this helpful. Feel free to share with me your handwriting stories as well as what you are actively doing to help your kids have beautiful handwriting.

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The “No TV January” Challenge | Screen Time Review

We had what I call the The “No TV January” challenge with my little ones.
The decision to go “TV-less” was a mutual agreement between myself and my husband because we felt our children were becoming too dependent on TV and screens even though we are so strict and follow the recommendation of the American Academy of Pediatrics(AAP) which is not more than an hour of screen time for kids ages 2 to 5 with screens of any kind – TV, tablet, phone, or computer.

Also, the AAP recommends that for children younger than 18 months, avoid use of screen media other than video-chatting. Parents of children 18 to 24 months of age who want to introduce digital media should choose high-quality programming, and watch it with their children to help them understand what they’re seeing.

In my personal experience, even though screen time is usually less than an hour, I realized that within that one hour, their attention is usually so focused on the screen that they hardly hear anything else. That became concerning to me. We had to do something really fast. I am not nurturing screen zombies!

I don’t want my children to grow up immersed in screen media, but I want them to learn to thrive without its negative effect.

When we started out with the “no TV rule” January 1st this year, it was tough. A lot of whining and crying initially.
At the beginning, they were so bored, but the boredom birthed creativity. They devised means of engaging their own time in a fun way. Over the course of the month I noticed quite fascinating changes and behavioral evolution.
They got more actively involved with meal preparation for dinner.
They took to helping with setting up the table for dinner more seriously.
They even ‘invented’ a lot of fun stuffs using materials they found around the house.
They have built a submarine out of my sitting room cushions.
My son made a ‘telescope’ out of left-over kitchen towel and invited both myself and his sister to see the stars and the galaxies. We played along. We imagined those things too.
People, I saw the galaxies by faith. I had to because his excitement was infectious. The imaginative play juice was flowing.


We did loads of crafts and creative projects.
We did a lot of experiments including a frozen colorful collage from milk and food coloring.
The children simply had a blast.
They made an imaginary ‘choo choo’ train.
They built a motor-cycle car( whatever that was, I did not see it but they did).
They made a man-made cave and pretended to be spelunkers.
They built a space station in “space” using throw pillows, kids activity table and two little chairs.

Their hand-eye coordination was improved.
They learnt to focus better with slightly lengthened attention span. Creativity got sparked through boredom. Imaginative play was at the forefront.

My son built a rocket with the help of his sister who provided motivation. Actually the following conversation ensued at the time, which was quite interesting:
Girl: mom , brother made a rocket with the table.
Mom: Nice. Did you help?
Girl: No
Mom: So what were you doing?
Girl: I was drinking water.
Mom: cracking up with laughter. Water is good for you!


We had lot of more engaging fun conversations and laughed together much more.
They even made a fishing line from straws and strings.
We had more chance to bond better as a family with lesser distractions from the television.

For us the parents, we found out we could actually listen to CNN through the in-built wall speakers. We were able to keep abreast of events in the country without the distraction of a screen.
That time has been a blessing and I am glad we did it. Indeed it remains a January to remember. Even though it seemed everyone had “TV withdrawal” symptoms initially, but we adjusted.


It was such a good time and I envisage a repeat in upcoming months. Perhaps we should replicate and maintain the same tempo or make TV watching twice a week or only for news and family movie time on Friday night. Time will tell.


Boredom indeed can be a blessing.
The imagination became vividly illuminated.
Improved gross motor function.
Cooperative play was encouraged.
Spatial integration was explored and integrated. These amongst other things were some of the benefits of consciously eliminating TV time for a while that I observed.

The possibilities are endless if only we allow children to be children and adults to be less technologically distracted. Every family should have a family media plan. What is your strategy to limit screen media in your home?

You can share your comments on how you limit screen time in your house.

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The Recycling Mom: Saving the Earth.

This article is particularly relevant at this time in commemoration of the International Earth day. 22nd of April is usually dedicated to that effect. This is a time set aside to have conversations on how to ‘save the earth’.

Over the decades, global issues like climate change, deforestation, loss of habitats, wildlife trafficking and illegal poaching, unsustainable agricultural practices, pollution and pesticides have led to a lot of detrimental changes to the planet. All these activities have had a negative impact on wildlife generally.

The theme for the Earth day last year, 2018 was on End Plastic Pollution.

I am not necessarily talking about the political action and huge civic participation where people march, sign petitions, plant trees, clean up towns and roads to accelerate work towards conservation and sustainability. My goal in the post is to highlight the simplest things we can do to make the earth a better place for all to live in from our own corners of the world.

I am not particularly a minimalist but simplicity is a principal for me. I figure that ‘more’ or ‘newer’ does not guarantee a better experience necessarily. I do not believe things should go to waste. Blame it on my ability to find it hard to let things go.

I am the kind of mom who would save the egg crate, the Indomie noodles carton, the pampers carton or the used kitchen towel cylindrical rolls simply because I believe that they can be put to good use.

I find it easy to turn a used yoghurt container to the water colour container or the used salt container as the new pencil holder. I rememeber when I turned a giant whip cream container into my next detergent holder for my laundry. Thereby, reducing the need to spend money on buying new plastic containers .

I use a old tomato tin as my measuring cup for rice in my kitchen .

We have to be enviromentally friendly and contribute our own quota to save the earth.

I do recycle and believe in recycling. Therefore I encouarge you to do the same if you have not started yet. It is an admonition to develop a ‘saving mentality’.

I was so sad when I read about the big whale found in a coast line in manilla with tonnes of plastics in its stomach.

I actively recycle waste in my house. The plastics, used polythene bags, carton, papers, goes into recycle while everything else that is perishable goes into thrash. I even teach my little ones the need to recycle and how to do it. They usually find it quite fascinating doing this.

I moved away from buying a plastic table and chair for my toddlers to getting them wooden table and chairs. To embracing more wooden toy collections.

We need to do our own little quota of saving the earth and going green

What can you do?

1 You can plant a tree( as a big gesture) or plant a flower. Get an indoor plant. Plants take carbon dioxide (CO2) out of the atmosphere to do photosynthesis, and thus help reduce the greenhouse gases warming the planet.

2 If you cannot plant a tree, you can start by recycling in your house.

3 You can teach your children to recycle and show them how by leading with a good example.

4 Re-use and re-cycle plastics. Be creative. Rather that buying a plastic pencil holder, you can recreate and re-used the yoghurt container.

5 Skip buying bottled water. Take your own water-bottle from home and fill it up with water. Nearly 30 billion plastic water bottles are sold annually in the U.S. Prefarably, choose stainless steel water bottle.

6 Rather than taking all your groceries home in those store polythene bags, you can go with your own grocery bag dedicated for that shopping purpose. I cannot tell you how much shopping bags I acquired in my house from grocery-shopping. However, I found ways to re-used those excess shopping bags. Rather than buy shopping bags, I use them to line the thrash cans in the bathrooms in my house. Apart from making it easy to get rid of thrash, it is creatively utilizing what otherwise would have gone to waste or serve no purpose.

7 Conserve energy. There is no point turning on all the light bulbs in your house. Switch off the light, plus you get to save money that way.

8 Conserve water. I know it feels good to linger in the shower, but that practice does not conserve water and not even helpful to your water bill at the end of the month. There are water-saving shower heads that you can install.

9 Go chemical-free. Buy organic and eat organic.

10 Go green with your transportation. Bicycling, walking, carpooling or riding the bus are the best ways to commute sustainably. Inflating your car tires, driving slower, and combining trips will all help you save gas when driving is necessary. Also,for long distance travel, you can take the train. I plan to learn to ride a bicycle myself!

Overall. try to reduce waste in your household all together. If you don’t need it, don’t buy it. If you won’t eat it, don’t buy it.

Support organizations and charities dedicated to saving marine life, fighting global warming or advocacy on recycling and waste reduction.

If plants do contribute to reducing global warming, then we have no excuse.

Choose to go green and save the earth!

“I only feel angry when I see waste. When I see people throwing away things we could use”. – Mother Teresa.

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My Three-day Detox.

My family recently went to the Ocean city, Maryland for our first family vacation. It was a blast. We spent a lot of time at the beach. The children built sand castles, picked up sea shells, feathers,etc. Also, we explored the city. We did the board walk and it was great. We eat out a lot which meant we indulged a lot. From pizzas, to waffles, tonnes of scrambled eggs, bacon, french fries, ice-cream, etc. Hello, it was vacation! Don’t be too judgy of me!

However, I managed to include some exercise into my action-packed week. I was only able to work out twice during the week-long vacation, which wasn’t bad at all.

Peradventure it was out of guilt of too much “enjoyment” and all the comfort/junk foods, that I decided to have a special three-day detox, when we got back home. I decided to “cleanse” my system by taking an 8 ounce glass of water with half a lemon squeezed in first thing in the morning. Then, I proceeded to take a green smoothie as my breakfast. I did that for three days consecutively. I want to share with you what I did and hope you can try it out at some point too.

Day 1 smoothie:

1 banana, 1 Avocado pear, 1/2 Cucumber, 5 pieces of broccoli, 1/2 lemon(squeezed), 4oz of water.

All these were put in a blender and blended together giving the result pictured below.

Absolutely Delicious.

Day 2 Smoothie:

I decided to add more green fruits. I used 1 banana, 1 green apple,1/2 cucumber, 1 Avocado pear, 1 confluence pear, 5 broccoli , 1/2 lemon( again squeezed) and about 4 oz of water. See picture of what I used below:

Final Result was:

And this:

Just Gorgeous.

Day 3 Smoothie was the same as I had from day 2, only saved half of it for day 3.



Picture of the day 3 smoothie result is this:

At the end of the three days I felt really good. For starters, all the guilt had vanished !

Seriously, It was a good thing for my body and I suggest you try your own little experiment.

7 reasons why you should detox:

  • It helps with weight loss.
  • It helps purify toxins your body may not be able to keep up with.
  • It improves your immune system .
  • It helps to boost your energy
  • You will have a clearer skin and more shiny hair.
  • Clearer thoughts, improved thinking and better memory.
  • It slows down signs of ageing.

Embarking on a detox of your own is not a bad idea at all, considering all the numerous benefits it promises to give.

To insure good health: eat lightly, breathe deeply, live moderately, cultivate cheerfulness, and maintain an interest in life.” – William Londen